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function HappyHolidays

Simply pass your religion & nationality to this function to get the politically correct greeting from me. :)


create or replace function HappyHolidays
(p_religion in varchar2, p_nationality in varchar2)
return varchar2
is
l_result varchar2(255);
begin
if p_religion like '%christianity%' then
l_result := 'Merry Christmas';
elsif p_religion like '%jewish%' then
l_result := 'Happy Hanukkah';
elsif p_religion like '%pagan%' then
l_result := 'Happy Winter Solstice';
else
l_result := 'Seasons Greetings';
end if;
if p_nationality != 'Chinese' then
l_result := l_result || ' and Happy New Year';
end if;
return l_result;
end HappyHolidays;
/

Comments

Anonymous said…
Here the same function in French:

Happy Holidays to you too!

create or replace function JoyeuseFetes
(p_religion in varchar2, p_nationalité in varchar2)
return varchar2
is
l_result varchar2(255);

begin

if p_religion like '%chrétienne%' then
l_result := 'Joyeux Noel';
elsif p_religion like '%juive%' then
l_result := 'Joyeuse Hanukkah';
elsif p_religion like '%païenne%' then
l_result := 'Joyeux solstice d’hiver';
else
l_result := 'Joyeuses Fêtes';
end if;
if p_nationalité != 'Chinoise' then
l_result := l_result || ' et Bonne Année';

end if;
return l_result;
end;
/
Gary Myers said…
I object :)
What about pagans down under where we've just had the summer, not winter, solstice ?

But at least you managed to arrange the celtic looking word verification of
lldsunej
Scott said…
Gary,

The code provided is done as "as is". No guarantees - implicit or otherwise - are included. Use it at your own risk. :)

- Scott -
Colin Sheppard said…
Sheez! I don't know if the Chinese like to be thought of as 'pagan'!

"PENANG: Today, the Chinese celebrate Dong Zhi or the Winter Solstice Festival, marking “the arrival of winter”. "

http://www.thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2005/12/22/nation/12933828&sec=nation

At 30 Degrees Celsius, the is nothing cold about Winter in Malaysia, except in Air-Conditioned enviroments...

Anyhow, their (lunar) new year is only weeks away at the end of January...
Anonymous said…
Just nitpicking ...
Christianity
Judaism
Paganism


Happy holidays!!!

WV: etnth - "Eatin the???"

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